You Can't Make This Stuff Up!

Webster defines generosity as abundance, plenty.  In East Texas terms, I am finding that to be "Hey, here's free food!"  If you read my previous blog, you will understand.  If you haven't, you need to go back and check it out.


Okay, so today was my quiet lunch day.  No friends to hang out with.  No one to listen to my complain about my day (gee, wonder why there weren't any takers on that one?).  So, I went to SmashBurger and just enjoyed (and I say that VERY SARCASTICALLY) this new book I am reading called "Radical".  So, I order my grilled chicken sandwich and jalapeno slices.  I know you all thought I was getting french fries, but I fooled you.  The fried jalapeno slices are lower in fat and calories, and I like spicy, so we switched it up.  However, when "Hector" (I have no idea what his name is.....he just looked like a Hector or an Enrique, but I digress) repeated my order back to me, he said "Grilled Chicken sandwich, fried pickles and a drink."  I kindly explained that I didn't want fried pickles, but that I wanted fried jalapenos.  He apologized politely, and corrected the order.  I filled my cup with unsweet black ice tea with citrus undertones (it is what the tea pitcher says) and lemons and sat down to torture myself... I mean, read my book.


While I was sitting there, a grandmother, her infant granddaughter, and her grown son walked in.  I admired the baby from afar, but wasn't too happy when she sat right next to me.  And I when I say right next to me, I mean that.  I sat on a long bench, and there was literally one chair width between me and Grandma.  "Great," I thought, "I'm never going to be able to concentrate on this book."  I resigned myself that I would have to concentrate harder than ever before, and when the Smashburger lady brought my food to me, my heart stopped.  She sat the food down, and what was before me?  My grilled chicken without tomato and onion just as I ordered, my order of fried jalapenos.....and the order of fried pickles that (1) I didn't order, and (2) I didn't pay for.  


"Ma'am, there has been a mistake.  You see, I said fried jalapenos.  The cashier thought I said fried pickles, but we corrected it, and I didn't pay for these."  She smiled and said, "It's okay.  You keep them."  And with that, she walked away.  Really?  Really?  Here I am.  Trying to be good,and within 2 days of each other, I have had a free upsize on my fries and now free pickles???  You can't make this up!!  Never in 35 years of living have I had 2 free things in one week!!  And now!!!  This has to be some cruel joke!


I removed the pickles from my basket (by the way, it is enough to feed 2 people!), and analyzed my situation.  I knew I wanted the jalapenos - I came specifically for them.  I convinced myself I didn't need to nibble on both the pickles and the jalapenos.  I was good, but they kept staring me in the face.  It was like I could hear that Vlasic Pickle Stork saying, "There's nothing like a fried pickle.  Eat them!!!"  The grandma next to me must have noticed some sort of battle going on in my mind because she said, "Oooh.  Are those the frittas?  You know, the asparagus, carrots, and green beans?"  I said, "No, ma'am.  These are the jalapenos."  She gave me a look and said, "Well, I have never had those, but the pickles are delicious!"  At that moment, it was like the skies parted, the angels sang a rousing chorus of "Hallelujah" and I knew at that instant - that lady sat next to me so I could bless her with my free pickle stash!  


I explained to her what had happened and said, "Would you like these?  I mean, I'm not going to to eat them.  They will just be thrown away.  I haven't touched them, I promise."  She shrugged her shoulders and said, "Sure!".  Just as I was giving them to her, her son walked up and said, "You can't be conning people out of their food!"  (Literal quote!)  She said, "She offered!"  I smiled and turned back to my food.  Food crisis averted!  Although, now that I think back to what her son said, I am beginning to wonder if it is a regular occurrence for her to "be conning people out of their food".



What have I learned from my two episodes this week???


I'm taking my lunch tomorrow.


P.S. - I had the Sweet and Spicy Chicken at Chili's tonight.  It is under the "Lighter Combinations" and is served with steamed broccoli and rice.  It is delicious!  And the best part - it is under 750 calories!!  You gotta try it!